So my son is 14 years old and going through the teens with him makes me so glad I’m not one - I would never want to go back there again. The challenges they face today are so beyond what I had to go through growing up.
But the one thing that has become extremely evident in the past year is his need for sleep and down time. The fact that he can sleep until 10:30 - 11am and wake up tired it amazing. It would seem that the more he sleeps, the lazier he is.
So yesterday Shane and I had to leave the house early to deliver the Porsche to a wedding and then the Lotus to an open house. We didn’t get home until noon at which time I could hear the television on in the basement. We ate our lunch on the deck and started cleaning the garage.
It wasn’t until about 2pm that I saw Dylan for the first time. He slithered his way up from the basement and plopped on the couch - still in his pajamas. Later he was back down in the basement and I didn’t see him again until I went to go put something away. He was all bundled up in a blanket watching t.v.
“What’s for dinner?”.
I think my look of total disbelief was enough to get the point across, but my then telling him that I didn’t know - why didn’t he make it since he was a total blob all day, sealed what I was thinking.
He did end up cooking himself dinner (pasta) because we had to go out to pick up the Lotus. When we got back and walked into the kitchen I stopped short. It was a cooking disaster. I hollered at him to come up and got the, “I know, I know - I’ll take care of it.” My direct words to him were to “clean the kitchen”.
Well we got up this morning and discovered what his definition of cleaning the kitchen was - and it was not the same as mine by any stretch of the imagination. The only thing I could tell he did was move a pot from sink A to sink B.
I got to thinking, “Good grief!!! Was I that lazy when I was a kid? There is no way I would have gotten by with that!”. Then I remembered…..
I remembered during the summer mom would make us all our chore list, and until we finished it, we couldn’t do anything. There were days where I would just sit around because I didn’t want to do my chores. The concept of getting them over with so I could do whatever I wanted didn’t compute. Doesn’t with my son either. The teenage brain is wired to do as little as possible. To have something truly done right it would seem that you have to make a list with every detail of what they should do. And even at that it is hit or miss.
So even though I said I would never want to be a teen again, I realize that I do need to put myself in those shoes and think back to what it was like and how their thinking processes are so different. What is so obvious to us as an adult is not to them.
Now I realize there will be some parents who read this who are thinking, “They better get that kid under control! I would never let my kid get by with that! Their kid is like that because they are tattooed people!”. Okay, that last one might have been a stretch…..
But really, in the scheme of things, we have an amazing kid. He is pretty responsible, has good friends, a good head on his shoulders, is a home body and likes to be around us, is an honors student, is money motivated (know he has to have a job if he wants certain things), and without a doubt, know what he wants to do for a living and what it will take to get there (aerospace engineer). I can’t complain. I’m usually pretty proud of him.
Let’s just say though that today, he will be making up for the laziness of yesterday. Complete cleaning of the kitchen, mow and trim our lawn and the neighbors, clean his room, and worst punishment of all…..go grocery shopping with me!
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